Ramadhan Karim

Two Christians were lost in the Sahara desert.
One is David, the other is Michael.
They were dying of hunger and thirst when they suddenly came upon an oasis, with what looked like an emirate with a mosque in the middle.
David said to Michael: "Look, let's pretend we are Muslims, otherwise we'll not get any food or drink. I am going to call myself "Mohammed."
Michael refused to change his name, he said:" My name is Michael, and I will not pretend to be other than but what I am. ...Michael."
The Imam of the mosque received both well and asked about their names.
David said: "My name is Mohammed."
Michael said: "My name is Michael."
The Imam turned to the helpers of the mosque and said :
"Please bring some food and water for Michael only."
Then he turned to the other and said :
"Well Mohammed I hope you are aware that we are still in the holy month of Ramadan."
"This is a lesson for people who change their identity for the purpose of getting favour "
INTEGRITY IS DOING WHAT IS RIGHT EVEN IF NOBOBY IS WATCHING:

Lesson to All Women

A couple was invited to a masked costume Halloween party. The wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need for his good time to be spoiled by not going. So he took his Batman costume (mask) and away he went.

The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain, and, as it was still early, decided to go to the party. In as much as her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him.

She put on a Goldilocks costume (mask). So she joined the party and soon spotted her husband enjoying himself on the dance floor, dancing with every nice woman he cuddled and occasionally giving a little kiss here and there.

His wife went up to him and being a rather seductive woman herself, his husband left his new partner devoted his time to her. She let him go as far as he wished, naturally, since he was her husband.

After some more drinking he finally whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had quick sex in the back seat.

She slipped away before unmasking herself or her husband and went home and put her costume (mask) away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make up for his outrageous behavior.

She was sitting up reading when he came in, so she asked what kind of time he had.

"Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there."

Then she asked, "Did you dance much?"

He replied, "I tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the spare room and played darts all evening."

"You must have looked really silly wearing that Batman costume playing darts all night!" She said with unashamed sarcasm.

To which the husband replied, "Actually, I gave my Batman costume to your Dad who seemed to have had a jolly good time on the dance floor. I am told that he was seen by Frank taking a prostitute in a Goldilocks outfit out for a few minutes. Don't ask me what they did; you know your dad still wants to behave like a kid."

Moral of the story: Don't try to sneak up on your husband/wife pass it on to all ladies/Men you Know

An explanation: Why Maradona wears two watches

Asking why Maradona does any of the wacky things he does is usually a futile attempt at finding a brick of logic in a hurricane of madness, but when it comes to why Maradona wore two watches while leading Argentina against Nigeria Saturday, there actually is an answer.

Maradona always wears two watches when he travels - one set to local time and one set to the time back in Argentina. Plus, as a man of extravagant taste (he also wears large diamond earrings and, of course, has a special expensive toilet seat installed in his hotel bathroom), Maradona also has a taste for fancy watches. A taste that the Italian tax authorities have enjoyed as a means of recouping a bit of the $39 million in back taxes he owes from when lived there while playing for Napoli. In 2006, they seized a pair of Rolexes from Maradona while he visited Naples for a charity match.

[Photos: See more of Argentina's legendary coach]

With those Rolexes long gone, Maradona now wears a pair of his own Hublot special edition watches that feature a silhouette of the former No. 10 raising his arms in victory (or perhaps to knock in a goal).

Of course, Maradona's accessories weren't limited to a pair of watches for the Nigeria match. In addition to the timepieces and his Goodfellas suit, he also clutched Rosary beads to help him pray for a fair match. And despite the best efforts of Nigerian goalkeeper Vincent Enyeama, Argentina got the victory.

If these results continue for Maradona, look for two watches to become a globe-sweeping trend. Paris Hilton will be wearing pink ones by July. Now you know who to blame.

Confession...!

LESSON FOR TODAY

Sometimes, we try too hard to get to the greener grass.

In the process, we end up in trouble........ And when you find yourself in trouble and you're stuck in a situation that you can't get out of, there is one thing you should always remember.......


Not everyone who shows up.......

Is there to help you!!!!

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SOME ARE THERE JUST TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE SITUATION..................

Grandma

Grandma & Grandpa
Grandma and Grandpa were visiting
Their kids overnight.
When Grandpa found a bottle of Vi gra in
His son's medicine cabinet, he asked
About using one of the pills.
The son said, "I don't think you should
Take one Dad; they're very strong
And very expensive."
"How much?" asked Grandpa.
"$10. A pill," Answered the son.
"I don't care," said Grandpa, "I'd still like to
Try one, and before we leave in the
Morning, I'll put the money
Under the pillow."
Later the next morning, the son found
$110 under the pillow. He called
Grandpa and said, "I told
You each pill was
$10, not $110.
"I know," said Grandpa. "The
Hundred is from
Grandma!"

21st Century

21^st Century developments....

We are becoming lesser by the day

Our communication - Wireless

Our dress - Topless

Our telephone - Cordless

Our cooking - Fireless

Our youth - Jobless

Our food - Fatless

Our labour - Effortless

Our conduct - Worthless

Our relation - Loveless

Our attitude - Careless

Our feelings - Heartless

Our politics - Shameless

Our education - Valueless

Our follies - Countless

Our arguments - Baseless

Our Job - Thankless

Our Boss - Brainless

Our Salary - Very less

Our emails - useless!!!